Black Friday

I don't know what I expected the results from the neurologist would be, but not this.

The talk we had was short but not sweet.  The neurologist is almost the same age as Don.  (Within a year)   He stated Don was chronologically 64, but looked and acted like he was in his eighties.   Don cannot handle financial or medical decisions, and should have a conservatorship and guardianship established.   That is already done.The neurologist stated Don needs 24-7 care for cognitive issues.  

24-7?   Holy crap.    I can't wrap my brain around that.   Is he incompetent like a 2 yr old?   Or a ten year old?   Or a twelve yr old?   How do you manage care like that?   I made an appointment with a lawyer to start discussing Medicaid qualification again.    If I need more help to keep him at home, how are we going to pay for it?    And will I ever be able to leave the house?

The news came after Don and I had a nice lunch with Jan and Ken Morris.   When Don went to the bathroom they turned to me and said, "What a shock!  What has happened to him?"   I had tried to warn them that he had been sick, but seeing Don at 133 lbs using a cane, and not following conversation really brings the situation home.    The lunch is part of what I am secretly calling the farewell tour.   I am trying to connect with old friends while he can still enjoy it.  Based on the news, I may be too late in the game.

The only bright spot was Don seemed to understand what the neurologist said.  He looked at me and said clearly, "That was some really bad news."   He seems to understand that he will not be able to be left to his own devices, like he was trying to do earlier in the week.    Maybe he will stop fighting what we are doing to make him better.